Characters - Janie

My name is Janie Jackson. But Janie? Ugh. I tell everyone to call me Columbia. Can you guess who does? No one. Oy. I like Columbia much better because I think it suits me. Columbia. You know, like from "The Rocky Horror Picture Show". That's my favorite movie. I live in an absolutely horrid town, Lakesville, PA, AKA Loserville, USA. Lakesville? Who names a town that? Anyways... although I hate my town, there are a few good things about it. One: my daddy owns the only movie theaater in the county, so we're pretty well off. Two: He lets me play any movie I want, once a month. And three: even in Loserville, I have some wicked cool friends.
So last month I chose "Haunted Honeymoon", this really bad movie with Gilda Radner and Gene Wilder. I mean, it was bad. It is so bad that it's funny. It was packed, too. I think everyone that went loved it, even though the movie was terrible. It was just the experience, you know? Well, this month I want to play Rocky. I've wanted to for a year, ever since daddy said I could do a movie a month. But this month, I think I've got it! I've finially convinced daddy to play Rocky. But there's a lot to do.
I have to sew a costume. My mother was a wonderful sewer, she could have done it for me, but she died of cancer when I was six. It's really sad. But me and my best friend Pallas are gonna sew costumes together. I'm gonna be (you guessed it) Columbia, and Pallas is gonna be Magenta.
Isn't Pallas the best name in the history of the world ever? I think so. Her daddy is an astrologer or whatever. Pallas is an asteroid or a comet or a constellation or something. Even Pallas doesn't know. But that's okay, because it's still a rocking name. She doesn't like Rocky as much as I do, but she does like it.
Me and Pallas have our costumes done and it's "T minus 4:36:07" Translation: it's 7:34 and the movie's at midnight!! I'm sooo excited. We're already in our costumes and make up. Are you ready, Pallas? Are you, Janie? Are you?